Without Further Ado

Now that we’ve been to court, and she’s officially ours, we can share our girl.  Could she be any more darling? 

 

 

Counting down the days (probably 40 or 50 of them, at best) until we get to see this sweet smile again and bring her home for good.  Step on it, Embassy!! 

Fancy Pants

We’re sitting in the airport in Toronto killing a 7-hour layover, though we’re not complaining…our Ethiopian Airlines flight took off over an hour late, we had to circle the Toronto airport for a while before landing, and it took us 2 hours to go through US Customs and Immigration once we got here (I don’t know why we went through US Customs here already, since we’re not in the US yet, but I guess it’ll save us having to do it once we get home).  Anyhow, we would have never made a connecting flight with a reasonable layover interval.  As it is, we have been able to enjoy a little “western” breakfast, electricity, free Wi-Fi, and cable television (apparently the royal baby was born this week, and it was kind of a big deal).  We’ll have a bite of lunch before boarding our short flight home. 

In the file of things-to-do-better-on-our-second-trip: My sparkly jeans were a bit of a headache as we went through US security.  I failed the initial metal detector and failed the secondary “body scan” (I saw the image on that one…my mid-section was lit up like a Christmas tree due to the placement of the silvery sequins and metallic detailing on my jeans, Yikes!!)  After an additional pat-down, I apparently convinced the authorities that I was simply a fashionista rather than a strapped terrorist.

Hard to believe that I was wearing these same sparkly jeans when I last held Baby A before we left her…20-some hours ago.  Looking forward to being home to Kansas in a few hours.  Looking forward to being back to Africa in a few weeks.

Oh yes, and I’m glad to report that our Dreamliner 787 flight was free of flames and unremarkable.   

Court Update

It's official!!  Baby A is ours in the eyes of the Ethiopian courts.  Things went smoothly... the judge asked a handful of questions, we answered them, it lasted 5 minutes (though we waited 90 minutes for our turn... evidently about 50 other couples also had a 1:30 appt with the judge J).

We've accomplished what we came to do (and more) on this first trip and our looking forward to coming back in 4-8 weeks and bring our girl home (next step in the process is waiting on the US Embassy to process paperwork so they can issue her a passport so she can travel with us). 

We are back at the Guest House packing.  We leave for the airport in about an hour.  We'll arrive back in KC Saturday afternoon.

Thursday

Another full day at the transition house with Baby A and her birthmom.  Some really sweet time. 

Baby A is just a honey.  We’ve really not seen her cry yet (it’s only a matter of time) and have only really seen her fuss a bit when she’s tired (and once when it was apparently bottle time and we had no idea…that item didn’t make it onto the rundown of her daily schedule that they gave me).  Thankfully, a nanny hunted us down where we were hanging out in a different part of the house and wordlessly handed us a bottle…Baby A almost jumped out of our arms to grab it.

Our girl is really happy and loves kisses and tickles.  She sticks her tongue out a lot, and she’s putting everything in her mouth…maybe she’ll have some teeth soon.  She likes to touch our faces and yank our hair (well, my hair more than Ryan’s).  And, speaking of hair, I got to help the nanny fix Baby A’s hair up on Tuesday.  “Help” may be generous…basically, I held Baby A on my lap and handed rubberbands to the nanny when she motioned for them.  But, I was watching intently.  I’ll still need some intensive hair tutoring when I get home from my friends Hope and Lily!!  J

This afternoon, we said goodbye to our new dear friend, Baby A’s birthmother.  She has established a special place in the heart of our family.  We sure hope to see her again in a couple months when we travel back to Ethiopia for our Embassy interview and to bring Baby A home.

Tomorrow afternoon (Friday) we’ll go to our court hearing and declare our intent to adopt our girl.  And tomorrow evening we’ll fly on an airplane…away from one and back to three at home.  My how our hearts are divided.

Accommodations

Below are some pictures of the MT Guest House, where we have stayed this week.  The accommodations are comfortable and they’ve gone out of their way to meet our needs.  We appreciate the breakfast…excellent coffee, fresh squeezed juices, and homemade breads.  We also enjoy the Wi-Fi (when it works).  Many of the staff members are conversant in English, some are quite fluent.  However, the plumbing, the 13” TV with four channels, and the diesel generator located outside our window (the one that saved us from 90 minutes of darkness last night when the electricity went out) remind us that we’re far from home.

The front of the MT Guest House

The Lobby and Reception Area

Kitchen area in our room

Additional photos from the room

The bathroom - the hot water heater is the tank you see.  Unfortuntaely, we didn't figure out how to operate that until AFTER our first shower :-) 

The balcony/dining area is located on the top floor.  This is a sign embeded in the stonework on the balcony.  They get an "A" for effort...

The view from the balcony

Diesel generator

Ethiopian Dinner

The director of the transition house took us to dinner last night at a traditional Ethiopian restaurant, complete with cultural music, dance, and food.  Ethiopia is home to over 80 different ethnic groups, each with their own style of music, dance, dress, language, etc.  The wait staff was in traditional dress, and the restaurant had a group of performers who displayed dozens of varieties of music and dance and regional costume throughout the evening.  There was a group of 6 musicians playing traditional Ethiopian instruments and singing to accompany the dancers.

Ethiopian food consists of injera (a large, circular, flat, spongy bread) and any variety of tibs or wat (essentially stews) placed upon it.  You tear off bits of injera and use it to scoop or grab a bit of wat.  No silverware is used.

Also, coffee is a big deal here.  Ethiopia is the birthplace of coffee and they take great pride in it.  They perform a traditional coffee ceremony that's more about the chatting over coffee than that the actual drink, probably.  Because of the way they make their coffee, you know you’re settling in for a while to be with someone.  One would never take coffee in a to-go cup here.  You’d sit at the restaurant or café or home and drink it (even if they did have take-away cups, you’d spill that stuff all over yourself the first second you tried to drive- or ride- in a vehicle while drinking!!).  Anyhow, the restaurant had a corner devoted to coffee.  They were brewing it all night, batch by batch, over a little coal fire.   

Our meal was really great (save for the traditional Ethiopian drink, Tej, that I tried…some kind of honey, fruit, alcohol concoction…I know it sounds so promising, right??!!).  And, the entertainment was wonderful.  I could have watched them all night with their beautiful costumes and intricate dancing.  The richness and variety and deep roots of this culture makes our own seem a little shallow and pale, perhaps.  Anyhow, we’re grateful for this chance to experience the culture and the people…so proud and gracious and friendly…even to foreigners, who garble their language, mess up their customs, and can’t, despite heroic efforts, choke down their Tej.   


PS---a note about blog comments: Thank you, thank you for your sweet and encouraging comments.  We are receving them.  We don't have them set to post on the blog, however, so you won't see it there after you submit it.  Don't worry that you haven't done it correctly or it didn't go through.  We're getting them.

A Day to Remember

We had the honor today of spending several hours with Baby A’s birthmom, and we can say without reservation that… She Is Amazing.

We cried together.  We laughed together.  We played with our girl together.  We were able to capture some beautiful photos and video of her with Baby A.  She bared her soul to us, answering our questions (which I hope will help us field at least half of the questions that I know we’ll get from Baby A when she’s no longer Baby A but 5 year-old A, and pre-teen A, and 17 year-old A).  She wrote a sweet, precious note for us to read to Baby A when she gets older.  We gave her some photos of our family and of Baby A, and a handprint of our sweet girl that we stamped on Monday.   

It was the most emotional thing I have ever known.  A simultaneous experience for us all... of grief and beauty.  Pain and peace.  Heartache and hope.  When our daughter asks about her first mommy, I will tell her that I know these things for certain…she is brave and she is good and she loves Baby A more than her own life.

Tuesday/Wednesday trip to Asella

We left Addis about 1pm Tuesday in the House of Hope van.  Three HOH staff members traveled with us, plus the driver, plus three children who had been in Addis for medical appointments and were heading back to the orphanage in Asella.  It was challenging to get out of the city due to major traffic jams (there’s really only one road going from the capital to all points south in Ethiopia).  Once we finally cleared the city, we saw a much more rural and “stereotypical” view of Ethiopia.  The drive took a little over 4 hours and we went through three major cities on the way.  The rest of the area was dotted with huts, small towns, farm fields (which were being plowed and planted with very primitive oxen plows and hand tools now that the rains have loosened the soil some), and occasional industrial factories (steel, chemicals, food products, etc).  I cannot tell you how many times we had to slow and swerve into the other lane or off the side of the road to avoid hitting livestock.  There were people (often children) driving goats, oxen, donkeys, horses along the sides of the road.  They worked to keep the critters out of the street, but you know how donkeys are.  I asked our travel companions what would happen if we hit one, and they said the driver of the vehicle pays for the animal (and if it’s public transportation, it’s customary for the driver and passengers to split the cost).  Interesting.  Thankfully, we had an excellent driver, and even though there’s really no incentive to them to do so, the herdsmen do seem to work hard to keep their livestock out of the roadway…most of the time.   

Asella proved to be a small city…maybe 100,000 people. It is the city where Baby A was born and where her birth mother grew up. When we finally reached the city, we went straight to the orphanage and met the director and saw the head nanny who cared for our daughter for the first several months of her life.  It was so wonderful to see our girl’s first little bed and the room where she stayed (since she was so young when she arrived, they used a space heater in that room to keep her warm).  We were able to ask questions about her time at that orphanage and about her birth mother.  We also enjoyed playing with the other children at the orphanage.  I was so impressed by the director and staff.  They seem so committed to the children and their well-being.

They performed a traditional Ethiopian coffee ceremony for us at the orphanage (a sign of hospitality and respect for guests).  The head nanny brought a kettle of hot coals right in on the floor of one of the larger rooms in the orphanage, over which she roasted coffee beans for a long time.  Chairs were set up for everyone to sit around the fire.  Eventually, two other nannies ground the beans by hand with a stick and mortar out behind the orphanage.  Then, they brought in a very small kettle of water and brewed the coffee in small batches over the hot coals.  It was served in tiny little cups with a couple spoons full of sugar (just how I like it).

We left the orphanage after dark and went straight to our hotel where we enjoyed dinner at the restaurant there.  I had soup and Ryan had roast chicken…neither particularly Ethiopian, but tasty.  The hotel was very comfortable.  We watched some Tom Cruise movie from the 1990s with Amharic subtitles and fell asleep to the noises of the street below our second story balcony.

After breakfast at the hotel restaurant this morning (which entailed a very “non-American” pancake for me), we stopped by the orphanage once again to pick up a couple children who were traveling back to Addis with us (they had recently been matched with families and will be staying at the HOH transitional house until they are united with their parents in the coming months).  We survived the 4+ hour drive back to Addis and went back to HOH to see Baby A.  At some point on our drive back, the HOH director informed me that she’d been in touch with our girl’s birth mother (I did notice that she’d been on her cell phone several times during the drive speaking in Amharic), and that she was going to meet us at HOH sometime in the afternoon.  We were thrilled by the news.

Entrance to orphanage 

Front of orphanage

Baby A slept in the crib on the right for her first few months at the orphanage

Bunk beds for the older kids

Hotel we stayed at in Asella

A neighborhood in Asella 



Quick Rewind

We have a moment for a quick overview of the past two days

Sunday was spent entirely in travel.  Our Ethiopian Airlines flight was good.  Over 13 hours, but they took good care of us and tried to make it as painless as possible.  We were served a couple meals and numerous snacks.  We watched a movie.  We tried our best to sleep.  By the end of the flight, Sarah had two of the top ten scores in a rather competitive in-flight Sudoku competition among passengers, and Ryan had himself well-researched in anticipation of his upcoming Fantasy Football competition.

In Ethiopia, we landed out in the middle of a runway and took a bus back to the airport terminal.  I was struck by the number of stairs we had to go up and down (with luggage) to get out of the plane, in to the terminal, to the visa/customs area, etc.  I saw a couple escalators, but they weren’t working. 

Visa and customs went smoothly.  We exchanged some money at the airport.  And, then we waited for a very, very long time for our checked bag to come through the baggage claim carousel.  Thankfully, we were in good company.  I would have been more concerned if we were the only ones standing there, but as it was, they couldn’t have lost the luggage of every passenger on board…they were apparently just delayed in getting it from the plane into the building.  It eventually showed up.  We found the shuttle driver from our guest house (who spoke fluent English), and made it to our room.

We got settled in our room for just a bit.  It felt like 2am to us (and we still hadn’t slept), but we were anxious to get over to see our girl, so we ate some breakfast (included with our guest house) and called the Children’s Hope driver to come pick us up and take us to the transition house.

Once we arrived, we were taken to the Family Waiting room, and in just a few minutes, the family coordinator brought baby A in to us.  We could certainly recognize her from the photos (though her hair was now done up in about 11 tiny pony tails).  She was pretty quiet and wide­-eyed as she was placed in our arms, but she didn’t fuss or cry at all.  She was just taking it all in with those big, beautiful brown eyes.    

When we got out the toys we’d brought (mercifully, she was grateful for both), she quickly grabbed at the one stuffed animal with a teether and put it straight into her mouth.  She doesn’t appear to have any teeth yet, but maybe soon.  She began to interact more with us, and soon we were brought some rice and carrots to feed her (it was about 12:30pm by this time).  That girl saw the food and went after it hard.  It took one of us to feed her bites while the other one held her hands so she wouldn’t grab the spoon.  She lunged forward for every bite and after several bites began making a satisfied little “umm” sound after each spoonful (lest you become worried that it was the first time she’d eaten for days, she really looks well-fed and cared for…all the children do, and she’s not skin-and-bones by a long shot.  I think the girl just likes to eat).

As the afternoon went on, Baby A got more and more comfortable and started to babble and make some sweet sounds.  She smiled and giggled at us.  She played peek-a-boo and was interested in touching our faces and eyes and noses.  We were delighted with our first moments with our daughter.  She was so responsive and interactive and happy. 

Eventually, we walked around the rest of the house, saw her friends, saw where the kids eat and play, met her nannies, etc.  We put Baby A down for her nap and headed back to our guest house mid-afternoon  (we hadn’t really slept in about 28 hours, thanks to that fire alarm back at the hotel in DC, plus I was starting to have a funny tummy). 

I had a bit of a rough evening and overnight, but I’m feeling quite a bit better this morning.  Today, we’ll go back and hang out with our girl for a little while before going on an overnight trip to the town where she was born and spent her first 6 months of life.  We’re looking forward to seeing a bit more of this country. 

(Pics from House of Hope - Children's Hope Transitional Home)

On to Asella

Sarah woke up feeling much better (although we appreciate continued prayers for our health)  and we are about to go see Baby A before we leave for a quick trip to her birthplace.

Treasure

Today we met the treasure at the end of this long journey AND she’s worth every step, friends.  Every step.

It was one of the best days ever…

ignoring the stomach issues Sarah started having after we left Baby A today.  We plan to travel ~5 hours tomorrow to her birthplace and meet some of the birth family.  Please pray Sarah heals quickly… this will be an important day to get answers to questions Baby A will have someday.

P.S. All communication networks over here are pretty rough.  Phones at the airport were “down”. 50% of cell phone calls have network issues and are unable to connect.  We have Wi-Fi at our hotel, but it is also working about 50% of the time.  We probably won’t post anything on Tuesday due to travels, but plan to be back online Wed.  Maybe.

Wake Up Call

We don’t fly that often…it’s a rarity for us.  That, coupled with the fact that this is the only flight from Dulles to Ethiopia today and we paid about a bagillion dollars for our tickets, resulted in three separate alarms set to wake us this morning and a fitful night of sleep.  I was up at about 2:30am for over an hour.  I must have finally fallen back to sleep because Ryan woke me when he asked, “What’s that noise?  Do you think that’s the fire alarm?” 

Sure enough.  About 4:30am, the fire alarm began sounding here at the hotel.  It was loud.  It was bright.  It was early. 

Some people were filing out.  Some people were standing outside their rooms looking at the commotion (all the rooms on all six floors face the center of the hotel, where there are a bunch of trees and water falls).  The swans paddling in the center pool didn’t seem fazed by the event (but they should have been…I sure didn’t see any employee responsible for evacuating them in the event that it became necessary).  The fire department arrived sporting oxygen masks and pick-axes and then spent a lot of time looking at one another and at the apparently-malfunctioning alarm system.  They’ve finally got it silenced now (probably thanks to a pick-axe).

So, here we are at 5:23am, almost 2 hours before we need to leave for the airport.  Showered.  Ready.  Blogging. 

Ryan just started the tiny in-room coffee pot.  Thankfully, it was well-stocked with supplies…all decaf.  Nice.



DC Dinner Date

Well, it took a small army to get us on the plane today…you people have been so helpful.  Thank you for your encouraging calls, notes, visits, and gifts.  Thank you for bringing us food this week when I was so focused on planning for next week, that I couldn’t manage to get dinner on the table for the day at hand.  Thank you for loving and watching out for our kids while we’re away.  Thank you for tolerating our dog for the week.  Thank you for driving us to the airport.  Thank you for the caramel macadamia clusters in my carry-on bag that provided my primary source of sustenance until dinner time tonight.

This morning started with Ryan running out to grab donuts for the kids and seeing this beautiful rainbow in the sky. 

It was like God was smiling down with a nice reminder of His promises to us (you know, like the one to never leave us or forsake us, the one to never again flood the earth, and the one not to drop airplanes out of the sky and into the ocean, etc). 

Our flights were smooth and painless today.  Final destination for tonight is Washington, DC.  We enjoyed a fun dinner date at a unique restaurant- Stone’s Cove Kitbar.  “Kitbar” is a made-up word (they do that kind of thing in DC) combining kitchen and bar.  Apparently modeled after having a dinner party in someone’s home, where people kind of congregate in and around the kitchen drinking wine and watching someone cook, this restaurant has a bunch of bar seating around a large, open kitchen in the middle of the restaurant where chefs take your order and then prepare your food right there while they’re talking to you.  It was fun to see the cool variety of entrees being prepared.  We had an appetizer of lobster salad cones.  I had shrimp and grits and Ryan had a funky flatbread (which included bacon, so that was a guaranteed winner).  We were able to walk from our hotel to the restaurant and back.  It worked slick.

All reports from home seem good.  We’re grateful things seem to be going smoothly.

We’ll leave DC at 10am tomorrow morning for our 13-hour flight to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.

 

Only at Walmart

I start this post by admitting that I shop at Walmart.  There it is.  I’m not proud of it.  I know I’m the only one (because I never see any of you there).  I know that shopping at Target would make me more hip, stylish, and intelligent, but I think a lot of things are a bit less expensive at Walmart, there’s a little bigger selection on some of the items I buy (I appreciate having 17 types of dog food from which to choose, you know), and I know where things are in the store, so I’m not switching now. 

 That being said, I would submit that there are a myriad of things that happen within the walls of Walmart that would never happen at any other time or under any other circumstances (adult women wearing tube tops, parents shopping with their 3 year-olds at 11pm, people screaming at the top of their lungs and threatening to call the police because their prescriptions have been filled incorrectly by the pharmacy, etc.)  Yesterday that list grew.  I cried while shopping at Walmart.

 It’s been such a whirlwind week.  We got our court date.  We tried desperately to book our airline tickets to Ethiopia with really short notice.  We ruminated nervously about the Boeing 787s that keep catching on fire.  We finalized plans for our kids while we’re away.  We thought about everything we’ll need to take with us to Ethiopia.

 At some point during the week, we realized that we hadn’t purchased any gifts to take for our baby when we meet her next week.  We’ve got a room full of special toys and dolls that have been given for her, but we wanted to get something else to take now (something that may well be lost in the shuffle of an orphanage full of kids…something she probably won’t bring with her when she comes home for good in a couple months).  So, as any good and thoughtful mother would do…I put it on my Walmart list.

Fast forward to yesterday…I was doing my weekly shopping.  Alone.  I can choose to fight the crowds and shop on the weekends, solo, or I can take my entourage and have the place to ourselves on a weekday morning.  I often do the latter, but this week we have some morning activities, so I decided to do the dreaded Weekend-Walmart-Run.

 I made my way through cosmetic and hygiene items, picked up a couple household items and office supplies, and was kind of excited to zip through the baby section to find some kind of cute lovey to take for our girl.  I was pleased to find a nice little selection of soft dolls with rattles/bells inside, even one racially-appropriate (thank you, Walmart).  There were stuffed animals attached to teethers and some attached to silky blankets, etc. 

 I was waffling back and forth about what to get, and it hit me that I don’t know my daughter.  I don’t know if she would prefer a baby doll rattle or a silky blanket.  I don’t even know if she has teeth to use a teether.  I don’t know if she can crawl.  I don’t know if her personality is zebra stripes or pink flowers or red paisley.  She’s almost 8 months-old, and I’ve never met her.    

 And then, I lost it a little.  I cried.  I’m not usually a cryer.  Sure, my eyes well-up sometimes (more these days than ever…not sure if it’s motherhood or adoption or getting old).  But before this, I probably can’t tell you the last time tears ran down my face and I required a tissue.  I’m not cold and heartless.  I get mad and upset and desperate sometimes.  I just don’t cry.  Except yesterday, in aisle G4 at Walmart.

 

 

Next Stop…Ethiopia

We've been in a bit of a whirlwind this week with lots of adoption action.  In the middle of the week, we heard that Baby A's birthmother had contacted the orphanage director (the newspaper ad must have been effective), and they went with her to court on Wednesday, where she gave her consent for the adoption.  Additionally, the staff in Ethiopia contacted the Ministry of Women's Affairs and found out that they had completed and sent their approval letter to the judge.  We were delighted with all this news and thought we'd be in a good position come next Monday (July 15), when the next hearing was scheduled.

 

Then the next day (Thursday), we got a call saying that the judge had issued us a court date!  So, we’ve got our marching orders…on Friday July 26^th, we get to stand before the judge, and declare our intent to adopt our daughter.

 

During this first trip, we'll spend time with our girl; appear in court; travel four hours south of the capital to the smaller town where she was born; and potentially visit with her birthmother.  The adoption will be considered final once we've appeared in court (FYI- as far as we know, the courts will close for the rainy season sometime around the beginning of August, so we're very grateful to get our hearing in before that time).  Then we'll return home (sans baby, ugh!!).  The US Embassy in Ethiopia (which does not close for rainy season) will complete some details for immigration/passport/birth certificate, and call us back over for an appointment with them roughly 4-6 weeks later.   We'll go back for our second trip to appear for that interview and bring our baby home (perhaps the beginning of September).

 

So once again, we could use your prayers:

• for safe travel
• for the logistics of lodging/transportation/documentation/court appearance to run smoothly
• for energy, patience, and health for Ryan’s parents who will be caring for our kids while we’re away
• for safety, health, peace and security for the kids…this is, by far, the longest that we’ve ever been away
• for our first moments and hours and days with Anna to be washed over with an extra measure of grace
• for our peace and sanity on a really hard day in a couple weeks when we'll have to board a plane and leave our daughter behind while we fly back to a home and a family that will seem a little empty for the next few weeks